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Wilbert
08-13-2002, 02:20 PM
Here are some stupid ass news briefs you all might like:

A British woman who broke her leg when she threw herself at a Velcro-covered "splat wall" has sued because she wasn't properly warned that the might break her leg if she threw herself at a splat wall.

A Louisiana man caught red handed after stealing items from a convenience store says his evil twin did it. William Dykes of Franklinton sais his evil twin brother follows him around dressed in identical clothes and commits crimes using Dykes' identity. Dykes' sister said that they do not have a brother, but added, "He''s not a twin, and he's certainly not evil."

A New York City woman who tried to kill herself by lying down on the subway tracks was awarded $14.1 million for injuries she suffered when a train hit her as she lay there.

The family of a 30-year-old man who bought a Nintendo game system and played on it eight hours a day, six days a week, even after suffering 5 seizures over 17 months until a sixth seizure killed him, sued Nintendo becuase he suffered the fatal seizure while playing on it.

A New York man, stopped for speeding, told police that his wife had just checked herself into the psych ward of a local hospital and he was in a hurry to get there and talk to her before she gets any crazier.

Christina Coles, 21, of Kent, England, sued the driver of a car that she collided with in 1995, seeking compensation to help raise her daugheter, now 4. Coles said that her daughter would never have been born if it hadn't been for the collision which caused her memory loss, which resulted in her forgetting to take her birth control pills.

blink
08-14-2002, 09:15 PM
I heard one time some guy sued McDonald's because his cheese wasn't melted. *NOTE* He won the case too.

A Fire Inside
08-14-2002, 10:28 PM
Add this to your list...

Cory "AFI" Chalmers is sueing the driver of the car that hit him last night for $1,000,000,000. Cory claims that the driver wasn't wearing his glasses. Cory was wearing all black at 12:30 am when he crossed the apartment parking lot, darting in front of the driver. Because he thought he was dying (pussy), he reportedly scream,"FUCK EVERYONE ELSE! BJORK IS ASIAN! THAT MEANS SHE'S HOT!".

Soopa
08-14-2002, 10:46 PM
I'm A Retard. I'm A Retard. I'm A Retard. , anyone see the clip where bjork attacked the newsreporter person just for saying "Welcome to Denmark" er somethin...I'm A Retard. I'm A Retard. I'm A Retard.